Reader stories: Prague singles talk love and sex during lockdown

Dating during the Tinder age, already tricky business, has gotten a whole lot more complicated during the restriction of movement, curfew, and ongoing bar closures taking place on and off since March.

But a study conducted during the first wave by anthropologist Kateřina Klapilová found that sexual desire as well as the motivation to find a stable partner are increasing among Czechs just as opportunities for making physical and emotional connections are being limited.

We asked a number of expats in Prague who are active on the local dating scene to discuss the challenges they've faced during this surreal time for singles. Their advice? Most respondents said being patient, creative and direct about your intentions have helped them lead a fulfilling dating life during the pandemic. Read their stories below:

An asterisk indicates that a name has been changed for privacy reasons. Quotes have been edited for clarity and length.

“Since the start of the pandemic, my expectations changed from high to impossible to meet. I’ve been on the look for a serious relationship and I know that I want. Since I am looking for my equal, emotionally, culturally, and financially, it’s essential for me to test the person in different circumstances: whether they’re willing to get the restaurant check, discuss an art exhibition or plan something exciting together. Plus, both of you have fewer opportunities to live your proper lives full of hobbies, trips, and get-togethers. As a result, you can not see each other for who you truly are."

"Both waves of lockdown took away from my potential partners the opportunity to show their worth. With COVID raging, after a couple of walks in the cold park and takeaway coffees, you move your relationship to the home environment, relaxed, familiar, and limiting. Quickly I find myself in the dangerous territory of getting very close to the person I barely know. It usually takes me a while to invite somebody to my place or accept the invitation. Now, you don’t have any choice: it’s cold outside, you are bored, you want some closeness. Having said that, I am ready to extend my boundaries a little. Big chances are never small stakes.”

“I’ve been swiping on Tinder since I arrived in Prague in March, and my dating life has never been more active. When I came to start a new job, I didn’t know anybody at all and treated Tinder as a way to find people who would show me around and talk to me. Before summer I didn’t go on many dates, but since the second lockdown was announced I went out with three different guys and it’s been great. You have to be creative with your walks because everything is closed, but I’m new here, so every stroll is a discovery. 

Tinder is tricky to navigate these days because there are a lot more lonely and bored people looking for one-nights-stands. It makes sense to be more careful with whom you choose to have sex during the pandemic. I live in a flatshare, so I want to be sure I am not jeopardizing anyone’s health and safety. I’ve definitely refused meeting with some people because one of us wasn’t sure about their negative status. Luckily, that was always met with complete understanding and respect.”

“Dating has been completely different, but the change has been nice. Thanks to the lockdown and the curfew, the dates I’ve had have been very intimate and I feel like I get to know people better because there are fewer distractions, so we concentrate on each other more. I cooked dinner for a guy on our second date, we had some Prosecco and a long stimulating conversation, and then we woke up the next day and went to work. Makes me wonder if I am finally an adult!"

In my opinion, as long as you are following the government’s guidelines, you shouldn’t feel guilty about meeting other people. I was seeing somebody right before the second lockdown, and we broke up by default because he never wanted to break the isolation, which seemed like an overreaction. I believe everybody should be able to live their normal lives as long as they don’t break any rules. Dating during the pandemic is less dangerous than going to the grocery store on a Saturday. My rules: wear a mask and wear a condom!”

“My partner of 5 years and I broke up a month before the second lockdown. By the time I was ready to distract myself with somebody else, the cafes had been closed, the bars had stopped serving drinks, and the only way to feel attractive and wanted again had become the wild pool of online dating. I am not completely new to this game, but the idea of a long chat over an instant real-life connection terrifies me. Despite that, I’ve tried."

"I’ve been fully transparent on Tinder, saying that I’m not looking for anything serious, but some chat and maybe something in the bedroom. I was expecting more matches since people are stuck at home not doing much, and I have a lot to offer. But getting people to meet with me has been hard. People are ready to leave their homes only for somebody really special. I haven’t managed to have an offline date with anybody yet. Although I had a Zoom date and it went great; we had some wine, shared a dinner and a movie on Netflix, and talked to each other until we went to bed. Maybe 'real' dates are overrated.”

“During the pandemic, it became harder to weave through the nonsense on dating apps. I am looking for a man who is as independent as I am, but what I find is a lot of bored and lonely people. I have been on a couple of dates since the lockdown was implemented, but there was no connection, and I accept that. I filtered some people out by declining their online dates propositions.

"The most important relationship I have is with myself, and no pandemic or lockdown is going to change that. My second priority is not to waste anybody’s time and not to lead anybody on. I’ve been open about my intentions with my dating companions and they were very graceful about it. I still believe people will find what they are looking for, but maybe the lockdown should be used to improve on the relationship with yourself.”