Hilarious Tripadvisor Reviews of Prague Landmarks

The Grand Canyon has been called “an overblown sandy ditch,” Stonehenge was described as just “a big bunch of stones in a field,” and the color of the Golden Gate Bridge, apparently, is “not as advertised.” The Daily Mail compiled a list of the most bizarre reviews for the world’s famous sights earlier this year.

Landmarks in Prague are generally very well-received by most reviewers on Tripadvisor, but even the Czech capital has its share of less-than-impressed tourists.

Prague Castle

“Don’t go up here expecting to see a castle, there isn’t one.”
– 953AlexC, London, United Kingdom

“I didn’t see it as a castle. It’s very empty, it’s dirty nothing has been dusted or cleaned for quite a while.”
– Denise C, Belfast, United Kingdom

“What Castle? First thing first, this is not a castle, unless you call a bunch of old churches and government buildings a castle.”
– Sho C

“There is not even a castle there, its basically a collection of buildngs on a hill.”
– IRBaboonLondon, London

I gotta say, I don’t get this one. If Prague Castle isn’t a castle, I don’t know what is.

Astronomical Clock

“I’ve seen more spectacular alarm clocks.” 
– James H, Letchworth, United Kingdom

“It’s just clock. If you want to know the time. Use your iPhone or your watch.”
– Michiel N, Breda, The Netherlands

“Looks nicer on a photograph”
– LLS1988, Belfast, United Kingdom

Well, it does keep pretty good time.

Wenceslas Square

“Its not even a square […] It was just alot of hotels and fast food places in a big rectangle.”
– Aria B, Coventry, United Kingdom

“Shabby and grim!! The other main sight-seeing highlights are so wonderful that this grim downmarket ‘square’ (which isn’t shaped like a square!!) was a real let down.”
– SUE C Manchester, United Kingdom

I’d like to officially propose a name change to Wenceslas Rectangle.

Old Town Square

“Nice monuments but a mix between the hell and Disney Land”
– Chasseral, CH-2206 Les Geneveys-sur-Coffrane

“A Medieval Disneyland”
– autraveler9, Auburn, AL

Hell and Disneyland seemed to come up a lot in the negative Old Town reviews.

Charles Bridge

“This is a good bridge, if you’ve never crossed one before. It has the basic features of a bridge — footpath, stone columns, a body of water flowing underneath.”
– akc_travelerHague

“A bridge is a bridge! It is a bridge, it’s supposedly old..feels old, full of tourists.. but not much to see. I got bored.”
– Sho C

“Nowadays, it’s nothing but a platform on which drunken debauchery takes place.”
– Dreams_of_Alba, New York City

Well, at least it’s not Prague “Castle” or Wenceslas “Square”.

Church of Our Lady Victorious – Holy Child of Prague

“Pathetic, this is not a tourist attraction. A kids doll in a dress.”
– Marellalouise

“This is a doll in a dusty old dress. At least it’s free.”
– Hemmy93, Prague

“I will never get back the precious minutes I wasted looking at this freaky little doll.”
– krust90, Sheffield, United Kingdom

That doll is kinda creepy.

Dancing Building

“Just an inappropriate building…”
– Ellen G, Brighton

“The outside is strange but did not stand out as you would expect from the pictures on the net.”
– toon-of-macktoon, Newcastle upon Tyne, United Kingdom

“Maybe it’s because I’m not into architecture, but it just looked like a strange building to me. I came across it on accident.”
– dhoag123, San Diego

Everyone’s a critic. And finally…

Man Hanging Out Sculpture

“Went to Prague with some close friends for my coming out party. I was deliriously happy mincing down the street when I spotted what appeared to be a gallows hanging from the roof of a building. Standing transfixed in the street I reached for my camera and was run down by a passing tram. The last week of the trip was spent with tubes coming into and out of every orifice.”
– CliffMarsden, Newcastle/Liverpool, England

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