My phone starts vibrating. It’s late afternoon. A series of desperate text messages arrive that go something like this:
“Called Lokál and they’re booked solid tonight. Same story at Celnice, Kolkovna, and Malostranská beseda. Parents and friends visiting. Need a table for 13. Any ideas?”
It was my good friend, G-Man, pleading for help. The large size of his party gave me pause. Even if I could think of a good place, it could be tough to find a big table on short notice on Friday night.
“It’s across the street from Lokál, it just opened, and they have 30 regional Czech beers on tap. I can’t vouch for the food, but someone did tell me they had a hamburger there.”
It was one of the more expensive half-liters. Unfortunately, I didn’t like it.
The menu says it’s a bottom-fermented lager that is double mash brewed with triple hops. What I picked up most of was the sweetness. The dominating flavor of honey was just too much for me.
Next, one of the ladies offered me a sip of the Skalák from Pivovar Rohozec (38 CZK).
It’s a 12 degree raspberry lager. Normally, I don’t enjoy fruity beers, but I liked this one.
The raspberry flavor was there, but subtle. I thought the sweetness was more understated than the honey beer. But my palate may have been affected by the order I drank them.
This pub does serve food, and of course, I was interested in the hamburger. While I was heading there from work, I called ahead and had G-Man put my order in.
“Good thing you called ahead,” he said later. “The waitress disappears a lot. The food takes a long time. And they’re bringing it in from the outside.”
Sure enough, shortly after my arrival, a guy came in carrying stacks of Styrofoam containers. A few minutes later I received my cheeseburger with fries (150 CZK).
On the large, toasted sesame seed bun, there was a dry, salty beef patty, topped with lettuce, tomato, pickles, onions, melted cheese, mayo, and barbecue sauce.
The bun was chewy, but held together well considering the large variety of toppings. It was big, filling, and relatively cheap, but nothing to write home about. It was something like Burger King quality, but with no flame broiling.
There was a massive amount of fries. But they had lost heat and crispness during their travels in the Styrofoam.
Someone else got the 10-piece order chicken wings (105 CZK).
They had their tips, which I don’t love, but they were still hot, crispy, and moist. A bit greasy.
The wings had a sweet-salty crust from a marinade. On top of that was barbecue sauce, and on the side was a plastic cup of sweet Thai chili sauce. The marinade and two sauces was overkill, but generally, we liked the wings.
This was the biggest disappointment. He said the chicken had no flavor and it was mixed with lettuce, tomato, sour cream, and barbecue sauce. Not a happy combination. Then, the waitress came by.
“You’re getting food from another restaurant?” I asked.
“Uh, yes,” she answered hesitantly.
“Which one?”
“I don’t know. Ask the barman.”
“Come on, you know. Where is it from?”
“I don’t know. Ask the barman.” She looked annoyed and walked away.
I didn’t need to ask the barman. The answer came soon enough. The name of the place was on the delivery boy’s bicycle: Fasty’s.
It’s a simple, little fast food place around the corner.
A Czech friend asked the barman if they would ever have their own kitchen.
“No,” he said. “But this place is about beer, not food.” I looked through the door behind the bar and all I saw was a space the size of a closet. So perhaps there’s not room for a kitchen even if they wanted to cook.
Our thoughts soon turned to beer again. G-Man’s friend from out of town was raving about the Kout Tmavý Ležák (60 CZK). This was the most expensive beer we had, but we all agreed it’s well worth a try.
It tasted of caramel, but it also had a pleasant bitter tang. And this 18 degree beer packs a serious punch.
I really wanted to try the Kocour EPA or the Raptor IPA recommended in The Prague Post’s blog about the pub’s opening night . Unfortunately, both were not available. As the blog post noted, to keep the beer fresh, they order small kegs and popular beers sell out.
Instead, I got a half-liter of the 12 degree Janáček Extra (37 CZK).
One person really loved this light lager, which the menu said has the “full flavor characteristic of traditional Czech beer with a strong flavor.”
However, I didn’t like it. It had a powerful buttery note that put me off. Another person who tasted it agreed with me.
Finally, I had a half-liter of the 13 degree Baronka from Žatecký Pivovar (59 CZK).
It was pricey, but very good. The light sweetness was cut by the equally light bitterness of the high-quality Žatec hops.
I always feel a little responsible when I make a personal recommendation. So I was pleased at the end of the evening when G-Man came over and thanked me for the recommendation.
“Yeah, the food and service weren’t great, but everyone loved the beer.”
The group was endlessly entertained with each round, passing glasses back and forth, comparing opinions, and debating what was best.
It didn’t even matter that we didn’t like every beer. There are plenty more to go back and try.
Brewsta is the creator of Prague’s first English-language food and drink blog, “Czech Please.” He’s now posting a new adventure on Expats.cz once in two weeks.